Once More Into the Breach

Finding Nonsense and Beating it Sensible

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I used to watch TV news and yell at the box. Now I jump up from the couch, sit at the computer and begin to type laughing maniacally saying "Wait until they read this." It's more fun than squashing tadpoles



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Monday, November 28, 2005

Canadian Defense Minister Admits UFO's Exist

Former Canadian Defense Minister, Paul Hellyer gave a speech at the University of Toronto telling all attending, "UFOs, are as real as the airplanes that fly over your head."

His reason for speaking on this subject was to warn of possible intergalactic war caused be the Bush administrations desire to militarize space. This would upset the "ethical aliens" forcing retaliation. He summed up his speech by saying, "The time has come to lift the veil of secrecy, and let the truth emerge, so there can be a real and informed debate, about one of the most important problems facing our planet today."

Fortunately, I know the truth. The aliens are from a a planet that has advanced technology very quickly because they are a rase of total geeks. The reason they are here is to tap into our entertainment broadcasting. That's right their such a bunch of nerds that they need to come here for good TV. Sure they solved the whole space time continuum, but they can't do stand up.

Hellyer's fears are even less justified since the reality programing craze. The aliens are likely to take pirated copies of "I Love Lucy" and "Saturday Night Live" and go home rather than suffer through much more of that.

The unethical aliens are another story. As anyone who has seen "Earth Girls Are Easy" will tell you, they're here for our women.

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